NAT GERTLER WRITER

I frequently get e-mail from people (usually would-be comics writers and artists) asking me what a comic book script looks like.

The truth is, they all look different. The comic book field is not like the TV or movie fields, where there are very fixed formats for scripts. Different writers use different script formats, and even the same writer may use different formats for different types of work. For example, I've used a "drawn script" (basically a poorly-drawn comic) for some of my work on The Jetsons.

The script format I use is one that I basically swiped (with permission, of course) from the talented Steve Gerber. Steve has even produced a Microsoft Word For Windows add-on that will help you format comic book scripts in this manner. The sample used here is for one of my "The Factor" stories. This tale appeared in Negative Burn 30, from Caliber Comics, and is being reprinted in About issue 0. The artist was the extremely talented, all-too-rarely-seen Janine Johnston.

Reading the script, including the cover letter, you'll see that it is written directly to Janine. The primary purpose of a script is to communicate your vision to the artist, and while the editor and letterer may have to be able to understand it as well, the artist should always be your audience. This is true even if you don't know who the artist will be, althought it's always preferable to know the artist before writing. (As it happens, in this case the script was originally written for Terry Moore to illustrate, in the months before the release of Strangers in Paradise volume 1 issue 1. When that book hit and was suddenly successful, I let him drop this assignment to focus his time on his own creation. The script was then slightly rewritten, to address Janine and her own strengths. As much as I love Terry's work, when I saw what Janine turned in, I didn't regret the artist switch in the slightest. If you read the story, you'll see what I mean.)

In this script format, the script for a single page of art can run anywhere from less than a page to several pages (I seem to average about a page-and-a-half of script per page of comics.) Each new comics page starts at the top of a new piece of paper. I've used horizontal lines here to indicate the required page breaks. The panels are each numbered in parenthesis (such as "(2)" for the second panel on the comics page), and the balloons and captions share a numbering system ("4 FRED:" means that the text that follows is in a word balloon coming from Fred, which is the fourth balloon or caption on that page.) The term "SFX:" means "sound effect"; these aren't numbered. "NO COPY" means that there is no work for the letterer in this panel. All-capital text in parenthesis at the beginning of a line of dialog (such as "(VERY SMALL)") is instructions to the letterer about how to handle this line.

I've recreated the look of the script as well as possible using standard HTML. However, this will only look right if your browser supports tables, and even then the reality of HTML might cause the script to look wrong on your browser and configuration.

Enjoy!

--Nat

August 22, 1994 Janine, Here's the script. I hope you like. Much of it may seem kind of pedestrian. This isn't by accident (it helps keep a contrast between the dream sequences and the non-dream, and gives a calm pacing), but I realize that some if it may not be the most exciting to draw. Sorry. Most of the time, I've left the chosing of angle to you, since you know best what you are most comfortable with. Do try to keep a sense of story and page flow in mind, and if you have any questions about my intent, give me a call. Also, knowing that I'm working with a strong artist, I've left a lot of things implicit, carried in facial emotions, rather than more explicitly in text, the way the original proposal may have suggested. Keep Lila's emotional center here. She's in what she considers to be a good relationship, with a good person--but it isn't really making her happy. She's been afraid to admit this dissatisfaction to herself, perhaps because of her background where things were scarce, and you tried to do the best you can with what you had, and it was hard enough to get anything that you should not just get rid of something just because it is as not as good as what you might dream of. But her daydreams of the Factor are her way of telling herself that she is not getting what she wants, what she thinks she should have. Perhaps she saw in that moment that the Factor saved her that there could be greatness found in men. If she hadn't gone through that, she might not be happy with Paul, but she probably would be satisfied. It's subtler than when originally conceived. I think it still works. Let me know what you think. The character Lila appears in one panel of the first story, but since that is not yet illustrated, I've asked the artist on that to hold off drawing that panel, so that you can design the character (since your drawing her for a full story, and he for one panel, that made more sense). If you could send me a picture of her once you've got her figured out, I'll send it on to the first artist, so that he can complete his story. If there's any questions, any problems, anything you want to mess with, any spare insults, whatever, feel free to call. I know you ain't rolling in the dough yet, so if it need be collect, that's fine too. Nat Gertler
The Factor Chapter 2: "Arms and the man" Script for 6 Pages Written by Nat Gertler Characters for this chapter:
(New) Factor He won't actually be appearing in this story, but will show up in the dream sequences. No two people seem to describe his appearance quite the same. The best description we have is that he wears a blue one-piece costume with a white star somewhere on the front, and a mask with either black hair or a helmet on top. What we will see in this story is Lila's romanticized version of him. Lila Martinez A 24 year-old bank teller of Puerto Rican descent, just slightly on the pretty side. She is able to get quite enthusiastic (and talk quite rapidly when she is!). The sole bit of her that we saw in Chapter 1 was when she was being interviewed after her bank was held up and saved by the New Factor; her sole line of dialogue was "...Werelikefourorfiveguys andtheylikepointedtheir gunsrightatmeand iwaslikesoooscared butthisguycameandhewaslike magnificentimeanhejust..." Normally, she has her wits more about her than that (the newsmen refered to her as a "good witness") but she was on an adrenaline high then. Mother Martinez Lila's mother. (You didn't really think I was going to have a character with the first name of "Mother", did you?) Puerto Rican, mid-to-late '40's. Somewhat overweight, but not huge. Probably works part-time in a grocery store. We won't see Dad, but he's around. RJ Lila's kid brother, 14. Smart and a smart-alec, but a good kid. Probably wearing a t-shirt with a basketball player on it, and a pair of jeans. Lean, and not likely to be found sitting up straight; more likely to be leaning on something, straddling a couch arm, whatever. Paul Kohler Lila's boyfriend. Caucasian, 28, blond hair, average looks, bad posture. He's a nice guy, he really is, but at best he's vaguely interesting, certainly not fascinating. No facial hair. At the upper end of his proper weight. (FYI, I'm basing Paul in most ways on myself.)
FACTOR: ARMS AND THE MAN Script for 6 pages by Nat Gertler Address and contact information removed for putting on the web PAGE ONE (1) Leave a thin banner space at the top of the page for a title banner. This panel is 2/3 of a page. It's the interior of the Martinez living room. It's not a fancy, expensive place, but it isn't a dump either. It's probably in a row-house, a small three-bedroom place. I don't know New York well enough to tell you where it is, except that it probably isn't in Manhattan, but even so, it's in New York, so it's less than the family could afford if they lived elsewhere. The furnishings are modest, but clean. The sofa's probably 10 years old, the color TV about 8 (with a cable box and a Nintendo system). There are a couple of chairs. The dining room can be seen through a doorway, and the stairway comes down into the living room (upstairs are the three small bedrooms and a bathroom, with a powder room downstairs). There are a couple of family photos on the wall, and a crucifix, there's a coffee table (wooden), a recliner, a stiff-back chair. Don't worry, we can't see all of this, I'm just setting the stage for you. Anyway, Mom (dressed in a simple skirt and shirt, nothing fancy) is on the couch, watching the news on the television, and is pointing towards the set. Lila is standing, holding her open purse with one hand, her other hand holding her hairbrush half-way pulled out of the purse, staring at the screen. (She was pulling it out when they started talking about The New Factor on the telly, which quickly captivated her attention.) She's wearing a nice, modest dress, solid color. She has her earrings and cross on. I see this set-up shot coming from behind and to the side of the television, so that we have the edge of the set to panel left, Mom on the sofa to the right, and Lila standing towards the far corner of the room, in about the horizontal center of the panel. But if you want to set it up differently, feel free.
BANNER:	(AT TOP) The Factor: ARMS AND THE MAN
1 TV:	("ELECTRIC" BALLOON) ...mysterious protector known only by his tabloid-headline name"The New Factor" has reappeared, this time in Central Park.
2 MOM:	Lila!! Look! It's that man what stopped the bank robbers! Maybe they mention you again!
3 LILA:	Humm?
4 LILA:	Don't be silly, Mama! I was just one of the tellers--
(2) There's a row of three panels across the bottom. The first is a close up on Lila, still staring towards the TV (off-panel)
5 LILA:	--and that was weeks ago. Even I barely remember that I was there.
6 TV:	("ELECTRIC"; FROM OFF-PANEL) Police report a family of tourists from North Dakota were being threatened by gun-weilding youths when the costumed figure...
(3) Lila has turned her head to answer, while going after a problem spot of hair with the hair brush.
7 MOM:	Paul should be picking you up at any minute. I like that boy. He's nice.
8 LILA:	Yes, yes he is.
(4) RJ emerges from the living room, a chicken drumstick in his hand, a look of mock disgust on his face.
9 RJ:	Oh, no! Not Captain Boring again!?
10 RJ:	Whatta you guys do? Spend long hours on the couch discussing the theory of kissing?
PAGE TWO (1) The door bell is ringing and Lila is reaching for the front door while Mom comments from the couch.
SFX:	(DOORBELL) DINGDING
1 MOM:	He's right on time again!
(2) Lila holds the door open while Paul strides in, a friendly expression on his face. He's wearing a knit sweater, jeans, sneakers. RJ stands off to the side, in a mock military salute, the drumstick across his forehead in his saluting hand.
2 PAUL:	Hello, Mrs. Martinez. Hey there, R.J.!
3 RJ:	Welcome aboard, Captain!
(3) Paul is looking down into Lila's eyes, his hand gentle on her shoulder, and she's looking up at him, happy.
4 PAUL:	Thought we'd pop into Manhattan and catch that new Judge Reinhold flick, unless there's something you'd prefer?
5 LILA:	That sounds fine!
(4) Paul has turned facing more toward the reader, and is looking around the room rather than particularly at anything. The smile has slipped off of Lila's face and she looks down at the purse in her hands, her body still turned toward Paul, though there is some space between them.
6 PAUL:	I really like Judge Reinhold. A lot of people just think of him as Eddie Murphy's sidekick from the Beverly Hills Cops films, but he's really a great leading man.
(5) Tricky trope time. We're zooming in a bit from the same angle. We should be close enough that we get just the lower half of Paul's face and all of Lila's face. She is starting to daydream, her head tilted and turned a bit to the side. The tricky part is that we've zoomed in on the word balloons as well; the words should look a bit larger. More importantly, the word balloon is in the background behind Lila. She obscures them. This should serve to isolate her in the foreground, and to portray the concept that Paul is just filling the air with words that are empty to her. By zooming in, it means that we'll have lost the top line of the balloon text, and the next line is probably cut-off mid-way. You may want to do Lila in heavier lines and everything else in somewhat lighter lines, to further isolate her.
6 PAUL:	(SEE ABOVE; MOST OF THIS WILL BE OBSCURED, SO DON'T WORRY ABOUT IF LITTLE OF IT FITS INTO THE PANEL. YES, I KNOW THIS IS THE KIND OF STUFF THAT LETTERERS KILL WRITERS FOR, BUT I'VE BEEN DEAD BEFORE AND PROBABLY WILL BE AGAIN.) He was really great in Off Beat, you know, that film where he was a librarian posing as a cop? And then there's Vice Versa, which was really the best of the strange batch of age-switch films we got a few years back.
(6) Zoom farther in, centered on her eyes. We can still see some of the word balloon to the side, the words larger yet, but they should be faded away.
7 PAUL:	(SEE ABOVE; FROM OFF-PANEL; AGAIN OBSCURED) Everybody raved over Big, and Tom Hanks was good in that, but on an emotional level, it was much less meaningful than Vice Versa, and both Reinhold and young Fred Savage did great work.
PAGE THREE (1) LARGE SHOT--about 2/3 width and 2/3 height of page. DREAM PANEL--we need a standard trope for this. Thick, billowy borders should do. It's The Factor, striding across a floor with faceless gunmen, mannequin-like, lying crumpled on the floor around him. No backgrounds; everything just sort of mists off into the distance. He looks gorgeous. She is picturing him as tall man with Puerto Rican looks, and the tight, musuclar build of a ballet dancer. The costume is a one piece, form fitting. There's a white star of some sort on the front; other than that, make it look however you like. He's unmasked, carrying the mask in one hand. You'll probably want a somewhat different style for the art in these dream panels. Perhaps simpler, with a thin, constant line, to give it an attractive fantasy feel--that's just a suggestion. You're the artist, you know what works.
	NO COPY
(2) TALL, THIN DREAM PANEL (remaining third of page width) The Factor is approaching an idealized version of Lila (fuller hair, slimmer, similar dress, but flowing... ah, you know how to work this better than I.)
1 FACTOR:	(FACTOR SHOULD HAVE A SLIGHTLY DIFFERENT FONT, SOMETHING GRACEFUL AND ROMANTIC, IF THAT MAKES ANY SENSE) Lila.
(3) END DREAM SEQUENCE. Close up--Factor carressing her cheek with his thumb, as she tilts her head into it, eyes closed, mouth falling open. Note that the word balloon from the next panel should overlap this one at the upper right corner.
	NO COPY
(4) Paul leading Lila by the hand quickly out the door. Lila looks wide-eyed, as if she just got yanked awake, which basically, she has.
2 PAUL:	We'd better get to the subway stop, Lil! You know how I hate missing the start of a movie!
PAGE FOUR (1) Interior, movie theater. By the glow of the light reflected from the screen, we see Paul offering Lila popcorn from a bucket, and she's waving it off with one hand.
	NO COPY
(2) Lila's looking up at the screen, when Paul gives her a quick peck on the cheek. A smile is playing on her face, but it's a small one.
	NO COPY
(3) Paul is popping popcorn into his mouth with one hand, while the other arm is draped over Lila's shoulders.
SFX:	Munch munch
(4) Close up on Lila, staring up towards the screen, unblinking.
	NO COPY
(5) MATCH CUT TO DREAM SEQUENCE. Lila (fantasized version) is looking up at the same angle, only this time it's into the eyes of The Factor, whose looking down at her, kind, caring, and protecting.
1 LILA:	You saved me!
(6) Last panel of dream seqeunce. Factor is now standing behind Lila, arms wrapped around her, hands on her opposite shoulders. She is leaning onto one of his arms, allowing herself to be enveloped. (How did he get around her? It's a dream sequence! He doesn't have to!)
2 FACTOR:	I came just for you.
3 LILA:	Why?
PAGE FIVE (1) Paul and Lila are seated next to each other on the subway, in seats with their back to the wall of the car. (Do you know NYC subways? About half the seats are in two-deep sets, with two facing forward and two facing back. The others are in sets of three or five, with the back against the wall, facing the center. They're taking up two seats in a group of three, facing the center. I seem to recall that the Toronto subways were similar, albeit cleaner.) Paul is looking at her, concerned. This sequence of 5 panels might work well as a pan around them, as if the "camera" were moving down the aisle of the subway, keeping focused on the couple. In the first panel, we'd be mainly looking at Paul, and seeing Lila past him. In the last panel, we would be seeing mainly Lila, and Paul past her. Just an idea.
1 PAUL:	Are you okay? You've seemed...
2 PAUL:	elsewhere.
(2) She looks at him, apologetically, perhaps a little confused, patting his knee with one hand.
3 LILA:	I'm sorry. I'm okay, I really am.
(3) She's staring down at her shoes, guiltily. Paul is holding her hand in both of his, looking worried.
4 PAUL:	It isn't something I've done, Lil, is it?
(4) She's laughing an honest, silent laugh, shaking her head.
5 LILA:	No. What could you have done? You're a nice guy.
(5) She's starting to space off again, as he shrugs in modest uncertainty.
6 PAUL:	I try.
7 PAUL:	I'm never quite sure if I make it, though.
(6) DREAM PANEL. It's a repeat of the position from the last panel of the previous page, from a different angle.
8 LILA:	Why?
PAGE SIX (1) DREAM PANEL. Full across shot. Close up on Factor, cradling Lila's chin in his hand, running his other hand through her hair.
1 FACTOR:	Because you deserve something better.
(2) On the stoop of the Martinez house. Paul is facing Lila, whose back is to the door, one hand on the doorknob. I see the last 6 panels on this page being in two very regular rows of three, and perhaps staying from the same angle, but again, feel free to do otherwise if you wish.
2 PAUL:	Thanks again for another fine evening.
3 LILA:	Goodnight.
(3) Paul is leaning in, eyes closed, lips slightly puckered for a kiss. He's kissing the air, though, because she has turned and is headed inside.
	NO COPY
(4) The door closes, startling Paul. It's not a hard slam.
SFX:	THUMP
(5) Paul stares at the closed door, trying to disbelieve what seems to be happening.
	NO COPY
(6) Shaking his head in somewhat confused disappointment, Paul turns away from the door.
	NO COPY
(7) We're still looking at the closed door, as we see Paul walking off down the sidewalk, into the night.
4 CAPTION:	(LOWER RIGHT) The End.